missinglinc:

relationship status: slept with laundry I was too lazy to fold


  • person: wow you drink so much water, you're so healthy!!
  • me: i cry so much i gotta stay hydrated
#text #me

justacoffeeshop:

doctor, I can’t stop singing what’s new pussycat

sounds like you have tom jones disease

is it rare?

it’s not unusual


neptunain:

sorry boys, but I already got my eyes on a guy who’s not interested


iwantabrickbybrick:

my worst fear is looking bad in a photo with a celebrity







"Being funny is one of my greatest strengths."



culture-of-choice:

pro-choice-or-no-voice:

Abortion statistics and facts! All information, charts and bar graphs are sourced above! A few sources accidentally left out: [x] [x] - Paige

Unbelievably important.

Use this to combat pro-life “statistics” (aka, statistics pulled out of a random donkey’s hiney).


captcevans:

Chris Evans discussing “love at first sight” on set of A Many Splintered Thing


amoying:

Chris Pratt seems like a guy that would get drunk with you and then carry you home